When a face escapes you

Oh to forget the face of a loved one! What a truly tragic realisation. Certainly many memories will exist for a lifetime, their laughter, their mannerisms - but their smile, their eyes - it is that which is longed to be held onto. To lose such a thing as a face is deadening, hopeless, soul-crushing. Particularly if that someone is truly a loved one.

Like a cloud of smoke in your minds eye, they appear distant- hazy even. Perhaps an outline is visible and a vague sense of hair colour. But like a word on the tip of your tongue, their face escapes you. It is a deeply regretful realisation for Evelyn to stumble upon.

Where are you, my love?

Where indeed!

I left you long ago

And now your face escapes me.

I saw you picking cherries

On a warm summer's day

But ran from your farm

and cried all the way.

I should have stopped to say good-bye

I should have blown a kiss

But in my haste I couldn't bare

The touch of your caress.

That was long ago

And now my tears are dry.

But my heart it still laments

Oh why? Oh why? Oh why?

Why ever did I run

From your farm long ago?

Though I know the true reason

I still question myself so.

Oh! to see you one last time

Would be a gift for me.

For I loved you up close

But now only distantly.

Those merry brown eyes

and strong jaw-line.

I see all your features but can never

See the full design.

Now I pace the fields of your farm

Hoping upon hope.

But never do I see you

Picking cherries on that slope.

Dawn

There's something hopeful about dawn. Though it is the same sun, it appears new. Though you are in the same place, it feels different. Like a promise. A promise of something better.

Evelyn has an inkling. As the sun grows with brightness, so too does this inkling grow. It is an inkling of hope. And as the light of the dawn is cast upon every crack and crevice, the hope of this new day spreads throughout her body, lifting her feet forward.

There was a time

When willows weeped

But all was contained in a season,

A season of lamentation and sadness.

But now the dawn has come

Bringing warmth and honey,

A new season

Of hope and gladness.

Dark night of the soul

Fury. Absolute fury has engulfed Evelyn. I say engulfed as it is though she has been subject to a beast consuming her. She looks and feels like Evelyn, but her eyes run red with blood. She is on the prowl. The storm of her pain alight inside fuels her want for revenge. Her need for blame. Her desire to attack.

Like a fly on the wall, she witnesses herself. She sees this monster overtaking her and cowers at the sight. She sees it as it really is - not of herself, but subject to the weight of her cross.

Terrifying shadows cast over the ground

'Til the moon hides behind heavy cloud.

Darkness ensues in the cold of the night

And reduces any possibility of sight.

This night is too long.

Oh I cannot bear

The weight of this pain, 

The toll of the wear.

Faster and faster the snow paces the skies

The blur kills all hope of sunrise.

I cringe and cry and crack inside

The very heart of me has died.

Not an inch not an ounce,

There is nothing left.

Not anything to denounce

For all morsels have been theft.

So farewell I am 'bout to bade

But first ask for Your assisting aid.

Aha! This is the key!

For suddenly You come to rescue me...

Awakening

To fall to sleep, not for the rest, but for the awakening on the other side. For new eyes to see things clearly, waking up to the truth you were too tired to see. Circumstances brought about the slumber but then too called you to your awakening. To your awakening. Awakening. Wake up. Sleep no longer.

Wake up sleeper, rise from the dead (Ephesians 5:14).

Evelyn has awoken. Now what will she do?

My Dad is a true man

My Dad does not know how much he means to me. He does not know how much I appreciate his tirelessness in going far out of his way for me. He does not know that I do listen to him and take on board his suggestions. He does not know that I notice the man that he is and take pride in calling him "Dad". My Dad is a true man.

He does not act selfishly. He fights for those that he loves. He openly imparts wisdom. He knows when to speak and when to be silent. He leads well. My Dad is a true man.

He is an encourager, a worker, a dreamer, and a man abounding in love through his actions. My Dad is a true man.

Thank you for teaching me so much. I have been watching. I have been listening. I love you, Dad.

Who are you when no one is around?

Who are you?

A feather in the breeze?

Or a trees blown leaves?

Only time will show,

Only "destiny" will reveal,

Who you are when no one is around.

I expect little but you surprise me - 

When you thought no one was watching.

For I was watching and I caught you.

Not as I suspected, did I catch you, though.

You were strong like the breeze,

Not the leaves in the trees.

And I was pleasantly surprised

By the look in your eyes

When you turned and saw me watching.

Oh! There you go again

With the strength of a hen

Trying to defend your little ones.

My eyes delight in such truths be told,

For I grew cynical a long time ago

That such as you could still be found.

Is Evelyn as pleasantly surprised by the true character of Shaphan?

The journey ahead

I did it. I wrote those wretched words. I endured and now Evelyn prevails! What a relief to have ventured beyond the abyss. Now winters gloom hangs above her miserable head and a new journey awaits her. Oh the excitement of it all!